I Think My Mother May Have a Personality Disorder, and I Am Unsure How I Can Help and Deal With It.?

Question by Bianca I: I think my Mother may have a personality disorder, and I am unsure how I can help and deal with it.?
I am sorry if this post comes off a bit long.

I am 16 years old. My father was an abusive man who had depression. My unmarried Mother decided to let him go when I was 6 years of age. I have been living with my Mother, and her parents all my life. My Mother is dependent on their money for all her and my own needs. She can not supply anything for herself or myself because she will not get a job. There is nothing physically wrong with her that would make her unable to obtain a job or be able to do one. Lately I have been trying to influence her to get a job. Tell her all the positive things about getting a job. “You’ll have your own money.” “You’ll feel good!” She doesn’t listen to anyone. She seems selfish, and feels everything is just fine the way she is. My mother does have psychogenic seizures when I talk to her about problems. It seems to cause her too much stress… So I have decided to talk to others about my problems, such as my Aunt and boyfriend. They agree with me. My mother has the maturity level of a fifteen year old. I need my Mother to realize her age. The other day we were in Walmart, and she asked me, “Who’s that fat girl?” She said this right in front of them.. They heard her and gave her a dirty look. Which then made my mother angrily tell the girl to MOVE! Then an hour later on my facebook, one of the girls was stating that they did not appreciate what my Mother did to her friend. I sent her a message back, apologizing and asking her to understand that I had nothing to do with this. She embarrassed me. Last night I was trying to tell her once again how I was worried for her future, when my grandparents are gone. I told her that if she wants to have anything in life that she should start working now. I told her that I had been talking to people I trust that are close to me to ask for help on how to talk to her about this. She told me it was wrong to talk to them about this, and that I was “JUST LIKE YOUR FATHER!” And then threatened to tell my Aunt that I did not want to have a sleepover with my cousin this week… (Which didn’t bother me) But what an immature statement, am I right? She has been telling me that I am like my father since I was 7 years old. Everyone around me says I am nothing like my father, who was an abusive, drug addicted, unintelligent, selfish man. I am just 16 years old, please help me.

Thank you so much for your time and input.
Thank you so much Everyone. I am home schooled and plan to further my education after I earn my HS diploma. I want to gain my PhD one day and become a physiologist. I have been dating the same young man for over four years and we plan to marry later in the future. I am a young professional wedding/family photographer. I believe in God and in Him all things are possible.

Best answer:

Answer by sowhat?
Study hard and then move far enough away from her that it’s not easy for her to get to you, or it will be YOU supporting her after they are gone! There is NOTHING you can do to help her, she needs to be on medication and or in a home! She can get disability. Don’t let her mooch off you your whole life or interfere with your relationships! Save yourself hun, have a nice life and just see her as little as you can and don’t let her problems affect YOUR life!

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