I Am an Adult but Still Trying to Get Over My Cold ‘mother’?

Question by me: i am an adult but still trying to get over my cold ‘mother’?
I was adopted as an infant. My parents went on to have two biological children. For some reason, I never felt loved. Sure, I was given meals. But from age 10 and on, I was really emotionally abused by my ‘mother’ in subtle ways, so much so that I couldn’t recognize or process this as a child.

She would openly talk to other adults about any deficiency I might have had. This shamed me from any adults, and fed into her (and their) dislike of me. Her bio kids could do no wrong. But she would make a ‘show’ of affection at holidays, ect, when other adults were around.

At age 12 I tried to commit suicide by swallowing some diet pills. I threw up, and was taken to the hospital. I remember the psychologist recommending that mom and I make a weekly date to do something. She reneged, saying that since I forgot the week before, it was off.

I left home at 15. I did keep in touch with my dad, but with her, she never even called. When I asked her about this, she said she did but I was never home (a lie, since I had romates who could take messages).

At age 20, my dad died. So I was truly alone. My ‘sister and brother’ were fed lies about me by mother. So they have never even bothered to contact me. My mother tld people, including her new husband, that I stole my fathers wedding ring when he died! That’s the type of lies she told and it is truly disgusting!!

In my 20’s she said we could go to joint counseling “if I paid for half of it”. Of course I couldn’t afford this. And she was quite well off.

I broke off contact with her. My sister and brother still have never cntacted me, no doubt from my moms lies.

I never did drugs, and always worked, and tried to go to school, when I could afford it. But it’s also hard when you are so emotionally damaged, and have no support.

I have a hard time still at times.

Best answer:

Answer by Steph
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