John L. Pastore: A Struggle With Life
case. When my dad wasn’t drinking during the day he would be on valium to get him through until he could have that beer. Alcoholism is not always hereditary. Alcoholism can also be affected by someone’s environment and surroundings. If a person is out with friends and everyone is drinking, they may feel the pressure in that situation and want to drink. However, Alcoholism, is in some cases, linked to genetics.
According to the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism (NIAAA), a person’s risk of developing alcoholism is 60% determined by his or her genetics and 40% caused by his or her environment (Soinski).
John met his second wife Mary (my mother) in 1975. They got married after two years of dating. My mother knew of the problem when she met him, but she was young and thought she could change him. My father had an alcohol addiction that grew as the marriage went on. John and Mary had their first child together in 1981, my brother Curtis. In 1986 they had me. My parents divorced soon after I was born; I was around nine months old when she left him. She had finally had enough of the drinking. I don’t remember the fights or the alcohol abuse. My mom says that my brother Curtis can still recall some memories, but he won’t talk about it. She said my dad would drink all day. He would go to work and then go out and drink. Drinking never affected his work, he always had a job and it never interfered. My mom also said that when he drank he would get mean and pushy, and also verbally abusive.
My sister, my brother Curtis, and I, have stayed away from consuming large amounts of alcohol. When we do drink, it is in moderation because we know alcohol addiction is something that could latch onto us. My brother Matt is following in the same footsteps of my father, the footsteps before he got sober.
My father had another addiction that added to his death: smoking. Smoking and drinking would go hand in hand for him. Smoking is the lead cause of Cancer in the United States, and leads to thousands of deaths. After my father stopped drinking he needed a substitute. There came his third addiction: coffee. I would never see my father without a cup of coffee with him. He always smelled like coffee and cigarettes. To this day, when I smell that combination, I get sad and think of my father. It’s very common to see someone out at a bar with a cigarette in their hand. It’s easy to smoke a cigarette and not drink, but it doesn’t look like it’s as easy to be able to drink and not have a cigarette. Smoking is just as addictive as drinking.
People get addicted to alcohol for many different reasons. “Alcohol triggers the release of dopamine- a chemical which produces feelings of satisfaction” (Ryan). If something satisfies you, you’re going to want to continue to do it to get that feeling again, which then would cause cravings and addictions (Ryan). Alcoholism is something that affects millions of families. In a study, it has shown that more than 30% of adults have had an alcohol abuse problem. This study is based on an interview conducted with more than 43,000 adults between the years of 2001 and 2002 (Hitti).
I am by no means trying to say that my father was perfect after he got sober. He was far from that. I can recall a moment in my life, when I was four years old that will stick with me forever. While my father was still an alcoholic he had gotten his pilot’s license and would fly a small private plane frequently, flying was his passion after he was sober. My brother and I had stayed over my father’s house for a weekend, which was located approximately forty five minutes from my mother’s house. He decided he would fly us home that day, and it’s a day that will always be graphic in my memory.
I was walking out to the plane with my brother and father thinking I was a cool little kid, I was walking around with my eyes closed. I said, “Daddy! Daddy! Watch me!” and then BOOM. I walked head first into the propeller of one of the air planes. Luckily the propeller was off, but it still sliced my forehead and top of my head open pretty wide; nineteen years later I still have the scar to prove it. I was completely shocked and scared, with blood dripping down my forehead and face. I can remember just running to him totally shook up not really believing what had just happened. I just wanted to get cleaned up and feel better. My dad didn’t take me to the hospital that day. He put me on the plane and flew me to my mother, who then took me to the hospital. I was so scared; I was just a little kid, and I had just walked into a propeller of an airplane! That’s just one example of the un-fatherly like things that my father had done. I believe that the alcohol could have effected him and his emotions in a way that maybe he didn’t know how to be a father in the nurturing way.
Alcohol effects many different areas of the brain, and